As long as I can remember, I've suffered from procrastination. I've tried to get organized, sort out my priorities, and start sooner but I always end up procrastinating and waiting til the last minute and I don't even know why. And it's not just the boring stuff that I don't want to do...it's the fun stuff I want to do too!
Like many students, I've put off doing homework and chores, seems normal right? Probably not when I think back and my first all-nighter wasn't freshman year of college...it was the middle of high school. I had this big early childhood project where we had to design a school, blueprint/diagram and all. A few days after I got the assignment, I went right to AC Moore to get materials because I was sick of being a procrastinator so I was getting a head start. Sounds good, right? NOPE. I did not touch my materials until the week the project was due (a month or two later) So I spent the week doing the paperwork parts and figuring out how the heck I wanted to design my school and the night before I put it all together. My mom tried to help me but eventually she went to bed and told me to do the same. Did I? Nah, I stayed up until I finished it, which I'm pretty sure was into the single digit morning hours. My consequence: mom brought me to school to drop off my project and made me come back home and sleep. (I'm not really a nap person so this was tough admitting I was tired)
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Starting so young, you would think I would have learned to break these bad habits by the time I go to college, but alas I didn't learn (either that or I'm a glutton for punishing myself) Aside from that major project all-nighter, I often got stress migranes from the "crunch-time" period of the week of due days or night before. Sadly I've even had a few fainting spells due to the stress of my procrastination. (yes this is true) But anyway, in college I tried to prepare and plan ahead of time but I still ended up procrastinating. I even tried to trick myself into procrastinating by doing other important things but I don't think it worked out too well.
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It got so bad, I was becoming convinced that my best work came from the last minute pressure. After the ordeal was over and I finally caught up on sleep (or attempted to) I always swore to never procrastinate again (even though I had produced good work) but in-between getting an assignment and starting it, life gets in my way. Roommates, TV shows, lunch dates with friends, a quick run to Walmart that turns into a day trip, and then of course dinner dates because by then my whole day is wasted.
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So these causes to the left of this paragraph actually ring true for me, in a way. Sometimes I just plain don't want to do something (usually chores) I mean who wants to go up and down the stairs doing laundry, then fold all the clothes and put them away? (that's quite a bit of work, hence why this tends to take me awhile instead of just the straight 2 hour block I could be done) If I'm not constantly sitting in my room, why do I need to clean it right now? (I can do a little today, a little tomorrow, skip a few days due to work, come back to it...) This is how I tend to get myself into trouble, I start to do the right thing but then I kinda lose track or interest.
The other cause that I relate to is the fear of failure, that is a big reason why I put things off because if you don't do it, you can't do it wrong. But I would never purposely not do something (maybe run out of time/incomplete...) Often I lack self-confidence so in school, if I didn't feel confident about the subject or project (which happened quite a bit) I was reluctant to get started. Especially in college like when I've tried and gotten a bad grade multiple times, I feel like I'm only going to do badly so let me have some fun instead of studying when it doesn't seem to change the result. But then I remember that putting off the project and going to have fun with friends (who have their work done) makes me feel anxious the whole time I'm attempting to have fun and then I get upset with myself for putting it off in the first place. Of course, sometimes I realize that I made the project harder that was it was by putting it off and pretty much took the enjoyment out of it and replacing it with stress.
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Like I mentioned, this procrastination goes past homework and chores, it invades my fun stuff too! I would like to be an author someday so I try my hand with writing things. I've got a love for FanFiction, reading it and writing it. However, the only stories I have completed are the ones that are one chapter. I am very creative so I tend to get tons of ideas but I put off executing them. I have 2 stories that people are waiting for a new chapter, I have notebooks and random slips of paper full of story ideas, but I have yet to type them and post them. I've been meaning to start using my Netflix more and watch shows that I'm interested in (this has been my plan since last winter but I have yet to do so) I've had so many ideas for this blog and look how long it's taken me to get this up. I've said I'm going to start walking around the park and exercising, and start my resume and send it out to companies, heck I even procrastinated starting this blog for almost a year and a half after getting the idea in one of my classes. I know I really need to try harder because if I've learned anything...my life is only going to change if I take the first step, I have to make the effort to make a difference in the way I approach situations. To all my fellow recovering procrastinators;
Any advice for me? Feel free to leave a comment :) #procrastinatorsunite